Beyond the Mirror

My family is made up of small people. I never saw myself as small. I never knew that my dad was short, that my mom was petite. They always seemed so big to me. I never felt small in their presence, never knew I was below average height. Until I grew up and saw adults on a different level. Until I stopped growing and everyone else just got taller. I realized that the little person in the front of the group photo-a head and shoulders shorter than the tall guy in the back-that was me.

The mirror never told me how I looked because all I could see was myself.

Now, size is not important, 4’9” or 6’2” doesn’t matter. But the superficial, physical world can teach us much.

In my actions, attitudes and personality, how do others perceive me? Am I small? Is there a truth about my character that I have missed because I can’t see past the mirror?

Our self image is always slightly skewed, at least a little. We are not always aware of what other people see when they look at us, of other people’s opinions of us.

I am the last person to tell you to worry about what other people think. Don’t worry about trying to impress people, about trying to look good or be cool. But what the people around us see in us is very important. It can be enlightening. What could we learn if we stepped out of our own shoes?

If I could see through someone else’s eyes, I might see myself being rude or arrogant when I did not intend to. I might see how a kind gesture was appreciated that I did not realize. I might be able to see the greed in my own eyes, or the compassion. The people who know me best, friends and even foes, can teach me more than I would like to admit.

Their perception of us isn’t always true, and sometimes it is more true than we would like. Either way, it is important. We need to take a look at how we interact with the world around us. Because what we do is who we are. To truly meet ourselves, we must go beyond the mirror.